Thank God for the friends whom I could count on.
For if it wasn't for them, I would've been hanging and clinging by the moment.
The gap of hole deep down hasn't really gotten much better.
Every little step I take ahead, feels like lifting a big rock off the pathway.
Some days I manage, and some days I don't.
Feeling sane could be a rarity these days.
I'm praying for more courage and clarity each and everyday as I go.
And I'm praying, that I do not lose my way, nor get carried away and lose my values along the way.
Two full months hasn't since felt like forever, yet so much has changed.
If you were to draw the exaggeration of these twist of events on a chart, it would've been a hyperbole in my 25 years of life.
Staying strong is one thing. Being able to distinguish from right to wrong, facts to emotions, truth to lies, is another.
Denial could be a lot easier to deal with. The hardest part is to take the blow, as it is.
If this was a test, it's definitely much tougher than any of the finance final papers I've sat for back in uni days. And back then I thought failing the paper was doom's day. Those fade in comparison now, they seem miniscule and no where near comparison.
I wasn't joking when I said I had very thin hope of what lies in the future. It certainly did feels so. Every bit as grey as it sounds.
The art of life is so full of vague vulnerabilities. Play it like a game, with all the preparation installed, and you still don't get to choose who wins the game, or who plays a good game at the end of it.
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